Ok, try the mobile thing again - see if it gets there this time without me having to resend it.
Of course that has nothing to do with the title. So quit digressing and get on topic. (As if I actually have one).
This afternoon, I noticed my new office-mate was reading a book with, what I thought, was a very interesting title. "The Tree of Knowledge" - apparently about the origins of thought.
Which instantly reminded me of Hofstadter, both "Godel, Escher, Bach" and (though I could not remember the title) his more recent book "I am a Strange Loop".
Then tonight when I go to look for them, I can't find them. My last recollection of GEB was at Reynolds, and I'm afraid I lent them to someone there - and as such expect that they are gone. Until I place an Amazon order, of course.
What is it that makes some things in our lives so important? I've only read GEB five or six times through - and read the dialogs many, many more.
Lord of the Rings was great, but it did not move me like The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant. Again read multiple times.
Some things seem to shape our lives, and we can't imagine ourselves without their constant influence.
Hmmmm - I wonder if this is how religion affects those who truly believe?
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Walking and pop philosophy
Ok, since I seem to have the best ideas while walking, and I do have a blackberry - time to try some truly mobile updates.
I find it interesting, but also a bit scary, that so much of my personal philosophy comes from pop culture references. Is it just that I'm not well versed enough to recognize the original sources?
Case-in-point - I really identify with the line from "Batman Begins" where Alfred is talking to young Bruce Wayne, reminding him of a quote from his father. "Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up again."
So as I'm walking I see a young family - the mother had obviously brought the young toddler to pick up the father for lunch, and as they walked across the parking lot the cute little tyke fell, as is so common at that age. I smiled as he picked himself us and rubbed his butt (though he had fallen forward onto his hands and knees).
It got me thinking - how much more harm do we do in our society by so protecting everyone that they never fall - and thus never learn to picke themslves up? At what point does protecting and rescuing others start to hurt them more than help.
Give a man a fish every day, and he will never learn to fish for himself. At some point everyone has to walk on their own, fall a few times, and learn to pick themselves up. As a parent isn't it part of my job to teach what I can, and then step back and let them learn, even if it is by falling?
Unfortunately very easy to think about and write, very very difficult to actually do. The hard part isn't the unsteady first steps, it is letting go knowing they will fall so that they learn to pick themselves up again.
(And doung this while walking isn't too bad, just have to pause when it comes time to cross the street :-) )
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
I find it interesting, but also a bit scary, that so much of my personal philosophy comes from pop culture references. Is it just that I'm not well versed enough to recognize the original sources?
Case-in-point - I really identify with the line from "Batman Begins" where Alfred is talking to young Bruce Wayne, reminding him of a quote from his father. "Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up again."
So as I'm walking I see a young family - the mother had obviously brought the young toddler to pick up the father for lunch, and as they walked across the parking lot the cute little tyke fell, as is so common at that age. I smiled as he picked himself us and rubbed his butt (though he had fallen forward onto his hands and knees).
It got me thinking - how much more harm do we do in our society by so protecting everyone that they never fall - and thus never learn to picke themslves up? At what point does protecting and rescuing others start to hurt them more than help.
Give a man a fish every day, and he will never learn to fish for himself. At some point everyone has to walk on their own, fall a few times, and learn to pick themselves up. As a parent isn't it part of my job to teach what I can, and then step back and let them learn, even if it is by falling?
Unfortunately very easy to think about and write, very very difficult to actually do. The hard part isn't the unsteady first steps, it is letting go knowing they will fall so that they learn to pick themselves up again.
(And doung this while walking isn't too bad, just have to pause when it comes time to cross the street :-) )
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Still alive, just boring
Yes, for both my readers, I am still alive - I just have not had much of interest to say.
No, that isn't really true. I've actually had a lot on my mind - what I haven't had is the opportunity to write anything while these thoughts are going on. I have been trying to walk every day at lunch - about the only concession towards actually working at losing instead of gaining weight, and it isn't much at that - and have a lot of interesting (at least to me, at the time) thoughts going on - but no easy way to get them out. Once I get back to work, well then I'm eating and trying to focus back on my job once more. The ideas just slip gently away, usually not to come back up until the next day while walking again.
Work is going quite well. I really like this job and company, and it is such a huge change from where I was for so long. Simple things like respect - it is almost hard to remember that the real world works that way. There are no poo-flinging monkeys here - it is a bunch of very good people all working hard.
The whole atmosphere is kind of different as well - because so much of what I've been working on is actual research and development, not generating reports or doing any sort of business processing. It amazes me still that after twenty years in this field, I am finally doing computer science, not data processing.
Somebody wrote an Einstein quote on the board in the big conference room. "If we knew what we were doing, then it wouldn't be called research." A few weeks later I found it on a placard - which now sits on my desk.
I had a bit of fun via my twitter feed on Thursday. The company is leasing half the bottom floor of a small (three story) office building, and we are simply out of room. Since I started they have hired 9 more people (one remote), and yet another is starting on Wednesday. Well they leased four more offices across the hall (sized for 1, 2, 2 and 4 people), so I played with the fact that I was told to pack up my desk - I wouldn't be working there any more. Instead I would be working across the hall - where it is even quieter, the office is laid out equally for the two of us, and we have a window!
I'll try to get back to this more regularly, and need to use it once again as part of a weight loss motivation. It is saddening to think that I've regained all the weight that I had lost two years ago, but it is true, and so far I have not found what it will take to get me to commit to reversing this trend and start doing weight watchers again. I know it in my head, but not to where I am yet doing anything about it.
No, that isn't really true. I've actually had a lot on my mind - what I haven't had is the opportunity to write anything while these thoughts are going on. I have been trying to walk every day at lunch - about the only concession towards actually working at losing instead of gaining weight, and it isn't much at that - and have a lot of interesting (at least to me, at the time) thoughts going on - but no easy way to get them out. Once I get back to work, well then I'm eating and trying to focus back on my job once more. The ideas just slip gently away, usually not to come back up until the next day while walking again.
Work is going quite well. I really like this job and company, and it is such a huge change from where I was for so long. Simple things like respect - it is almost hard to remember that the real world works that way. There are no poo-flinging monkeys here - it is a bunch of very good people all working hard.
The whole atmosphere is kind of different as well - because so much of what I've been working on is actual research and development, not generating reports or doing any sort of business processing. It amazes me still that after twenty years in this field, I am finally doing computer science, not data processing.
Somebody wrote an Einstein quote on the board in the big conference room. "If we knew what we were doing, then it wouldn't be called research." A few weeks later I found it on a placard - which now sits on my desk.
I had a bit of fun via my twitter feed on Thursday. The company is leasing half the bottom floor of a small (three story) office building, and we are simply out of room. Since I started they have hired 9 more people (one remote), and yet another is starting on Wednesday. Well they leased four more offices across the hall (sized for 1, 2, 2 and 4 people), so I played with the fact that I was told to pack up my desk - I wouldn't be working there any more. Instead I would be working across the hall - where it is even quieter, the office is laid out equally for the two of us, and we have a window!
I'll try to get back to this more regularly, and need to use it once again as part of a weight loss motivation. It is saddening to think that I've regained all the weight that I had lost two years ago, but it is true, and so far I have not found what it will take to get me to commit to reversing this trend and start doing weight watchers again. I know it in my head, but not to where I am yet doing anything about it.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Getting to know you
You've been tagged or you are reading this, you have the honor of copying all these goofy questions, writing your own response, and tagging 25 other victims. You have to tag me so really you just need 24 more people. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you - but not in a creepy stalker kind of way.
To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your title as "Getting to know each other!", tag 25 people including me (tagging is done in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.
1. What time did you get up this morning? 6:00 AM
2. How do you like your steak? medium rare - nice and juicy
3. What was the last movie you saw? The Ugly Truth
4. What is your favorite TV show? Lost
5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Colorado
6. What did you have for breakfast? Powdered eggs, horrid hash white potatoes, french toase, coffee
7. What is your favorite cuisine? japanese
8. What foods do you dislike? Vegetarian
9. Favorite Place to Eat? Sake'
10. Favorite dressing? Ranch
11. What kind of vehicle do you drive? '03 Kia Sedona
12. What are your favorite clothes? jeans and T-shirt
13. Where would you visit if you had the chance? Ireland
14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full? The cup is twice as big as it needs to be
15. Where would you want to retire? Colorado or Florida
16. Favorite time of day? evening
17. Where were you born? Lamar, CO
18. What is your favorite sport to watch? don't watch sports
19. Who do you think will not tag you back? I don't know
20. Person you expect to tag you back first? I don't know
21. Who are you most curious about their responses to this? Everyone
22. Bird watcher? no
23. Are you a morning person or a night person? both, it is the afternoons I have trouble with
24. Doyou have any pets? yes, Australian Cattle Dog that is too smart for our own good.
25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share? nope
26. What did you want to be when you were little? astronaut
27. What is your best childhood memory? fishing with my dad
28. Are you a cat or dog person? dog
29. Are you married? Yes
30. Always wear your seat belt? pretty much
31. Been in a car accident? Yes.
32. Any pet peeves? yes.
33. Favorite Pizza Toppings? sausage
34. Favorite Flower? alstromeria
35. Favorite ice cream? French Vanilla
36. Favorite fast food restaurant? SubwayZ
37. How many times did you fail your driver's test? Once written, none driving
38. From whom did you get your last email? Sallie Mae
39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Best Buy
40. Do anything spontaneous lately? no
41. Like your job? yes
42. Broccoli? sometimes raw, never cooked
43. What was your favorite vacation? Caribean cruise
44. Last person you went out to dinner with? The entire band
45. What are you listening to right now? nothing
46. What is your favorite color? blue
47. How many tattoos do you have? none
48. How many are you tagging for this quiz? 0
49. What time did you finish this quiz? 3:48 pm EDT
50. Coffee Drinker? Yes
To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your title as "Getting to know each other!", tag 25 people including me (tagging is done in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.
1. What time did you get up this morning? 6:00 AM
2. How do you like your steak? medium rare - nice and juicy
3. What was the last movie you saw? The Ugly Truth
4. What is your favorite TV show? Lost
5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Colorado
6. What did you have for breakfast? Powdered eggs, horrid hash white potatoes, french toase, coffee
7. What is your favorite cuisine? japanese
8. What foods do you dislike? Vegetarian
9. Favorite Place to Eat? Sake'
10. Favorite dressing? Ranch
11. What kind of vehicle do you drive? '03 Kia Sedona
12. What are your favorite clothes? jeans and T-shirt
13. Where would you visit if you had the chance? Ireland
14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full? The cup is twice as big as it needs to be
15. Where would you want to retire? Colorado or Florida
16. Favorite time of day? evening
17. Where were you born? Lamar, CO
18. What is your favorite sport to watch? don't watch sports
19. Who do you think will not tag you back? I don't know
20. Person you expect to tag you back first? I don't know
21. Who are you most curious about their responses to this? Everyone
22. Bird watcher? no
23. Are you a morning person or a night person? both, it is the afternoons I have trouble with
24. Doyou have any pets? yes, Australian Cattle Dog that is too smart for our own good.
25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share? nope
26. What did you want to be when you were little? astronaut
27. What is your best childhood memory? fishing with my dad
28. Are you a cat or dog person? dog
29. Are you married? Yes
30. Always wear your seat belt? pretty much
31. Been in a car accident? Yes.
32. Any pet peeves? yes.
33. Favorite Pizza Toppings? sausage
34. Favorite Flower? alstromeria
35. Favorite ice cream? French Vanilla
36. Favorite fast food restaurant? SubwayZ
37. How many times did you fail your driver's test? Once written, none driving
38. From whom did you get your last email? Sallie Mae
39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Best Buy
40. Do anything spontaneous lately? no
41. Like your job? yes
42. Broccoli? sometimes raw, never cooked
43. What was your favorite vacation? Caribean cruise
44. Last person you went out to dinner with? The entire band
45. What are you listening to right now? nothing
46. What is your favorite color? blue
47. How many tattoos do you have? none
48. How many are you tagging for this quiz? 0
49. What time did you finish this quiz? 3:48 pm EDT
50. Coffee Drinker? Yes
Monday, July 20, 2009
Word
USING ONLY ONE WORD! It's not as easy as you might think! Copy and change the answers to suit you and pass it on. It's really hard to only use one word answers. Send to 20 people. Be sure to tag the person you received it from!
1. Where is your cell phone? belt
2. Your significant other? Diane
3. Your hair? missing
4. Your mother? Shirley
5. Your father? Joe
6. Your favorite? sushi
7. Your dream last night? none
8. Your favorite drink? mixed
9. Your dream/goal? happiness
10. What room you are in? dining
11. Your hobby? gaming
12. Your fear? failure
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? richer
14. Where were you last night? home
15. Something that you aren't? rich
16. Muffins? blueberry
17. Wish list item? money
18. Where you grew up? Colorado
19. Last thing you did? drive
20. What are you wearing? black
21. Your TV? downstairs
22. Your pets? Scout
23. Friends? some
24. Your life? here
25. Your mood? tired
26. Missing someone? no
27. Car? Toyota
28. Something you're not wearing? wig
29. Your favorite store? game
30. Your favorite color? blue
33. When is the last time you laughed? today
34. Last time you cried? dunno
35. Who will resend this? noone
36. One place that I go to over and over? work
37. One person who emails me regularly? Diane
38. My favorite place to eat? Sake'
1. Where is your cell phone? belt
2. Your significant other? Diane
3. Your hair? missing
4. Your mother? Shirley
5. Your father? Joe
6. Your favorite? sushi
7. Your dream last night? none
8. Your favorite drink? mixed
9. Your dream/goal? happiness
10. What room you are in? dining
11. Your hobby? gaming
12. Your fear? failure
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? richer
14. Where were you last night? home
15. Something that you aren't? rich
16. Muffins? blueberry
17. Wish list item? money
18. Where you grew up? Colorado
19. Last thing you did? drive
20. What are you wearing? black
21. Your TV? downstairs
22. Your pets? Scout
23. Friends? some
24. Your life? here
25. Your mood? tired
26. Missing someone? no
27. Car? Toyota
28. Something you're not wearing? wig
29. Your favorite store? game
30. Your favorite color? blue
33. When is the last time you laughed? today
34. Last time you cried? dunno
35. Who will resend this? noone
36. One place that I go to over and over? work
37. One person who emails me regularly? Diane
38. My favorite place to eat? Sake'
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
Happy Thoughts! :-)
Ok, I guess I don't have to write only the bad stuff. I can say that I really like my new job, especially now that I am starting to understand the framework so I don't feel like a complete idiot (just a partial one :-)).
It is nice working in an environment of respect, instead of being treated like crap. It will probably still be a while before I completely get rid of the feeling of being constantly watched over, but it is getting there.
My daughter is in her first apartment - that is good news. No more fights at home all the time. Now if she will get her stufent loans straightened out, get a job, get a driver's license then I can worry a little less every day (and have her not call at 1:30 am baking cookies and the oven won't turn off - no I don't know what she was talking about then either).
Getting ready for a big Warhammer tournament this weekend with my Grateful Undead army (pics are here - http://puggimer.net/gratefulundead.htm for anyone interested. The last 40 deadheads (zombies) including one for Michael Jackson will be based tonight, and I will take some new pictures with the display base and all 240+ models.
Band camp is in less than three weeks - was fun last year - kind of looking forward to it again.
Ok, enough happy thoughts - I now return you to your regularly scheduled whining and complaining.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
It is nice working in an environment of respect, instead of being treated like crap. It will probably still be a while before I completely get rid of the feeling of being constantly watched over, but it is getting there.
My daughter is in her first apartment - that is good news. No more fights at home all the time. Now if she will get her stufent loans straightened out, get a job, get a driver's license then I can worry a little less every day (and have her not call at 1:30 am baking cookies and the oven won't turn off - no I don't know what she was talking about then either).
Getting ready for a big Warhammer tournament this weekend with my Grateful Undead army (pics are here - http://puggimer.net/gratefulundead.htm for anyone interested. The last 40 deadheads (zombies) including one for Michael Jackson will be based tonight, and I will take some new pictures with the display base and all 240+ models.
Band camp is in less than three weeks - was fun last year - kind of looking forward to it again.
Ok, enough happy thoughts - I now return you to your regularly scheduled whining and complaining.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Friday, July 03, 2009
Moving day
I hate moving. I hate helping others move. The good thing about that however is once everything is moved, you can go home while they unpack and organize.
So the second kid moved out today. Would have been easier had it been a dorm, but an apartment is ok as well. Doing the father thing and helping (i.e. paying for) some of the things she needs.
It is the first step on her new grand adventure of life (and funny that it is on her 19th birthday as well), and like all adventures is exciting, scary, nerve wracking, painful and joyful; sometimes all at once.
Yes, I'll be worrying about her, but this day had to come, and both her and the rest of the family will be more peaceful for it.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Thursday, July 02, 2009
Shame on me
for not updating my blog. Yes, I've been busy, and with a good job there just isn't things to complain about. I'm still getting used to working for a company where both me and my opinion are respected, and though I feel like I am still watching over my shoulder - there isn't anything there anymore.
The work is very challenging (i.e. it is kicking my butt trying to understand everything) and I am the resident expert on several things which I feel I'm barely scratching the surface of. Of course then I turn around and am able to crank out some things now in a few minutes that a couple of months ago I was beating my head against the wall over.
Not that I don't get that feeling - it is just over new things now.
And the company is doing lots of new things - kind of the very definition of what we do.
On the white board in the small conference room someone wrote the quote:
"If we knew what we were doing, they wouldn't call it research" - A. Einstein
I do tend to update my twitter feed a least once a day, so it does give both my readers who aren't following me something to read.
In good news, I won Best Army at the Origins Warhammer Fantasy Battles tournament put on by the Olde World Warriors. I finally picked up a new digital camera - so there are new pictures of them up on my site - http://puggimer.net/gratefulundead.html
The work is very challenging (i.e. it is kicking my butt trying to understand everything) and I am the resident expert on several things which I feel I'm barely scratching the surface of. Of course then I turn around and am able to crank out some things now in a few minutes that a couple of months ago I was beating my head against the wall over.
Not that I don't get that feeling - it is just over new things now.
And the company is doing lots of new things - kind of the very definition of what we do.
On the white board in the small conference room someone wrote the quote:
"If we knew what we were doing, they wouldn't call it research" - A. Einstein
I do tend to update my twitter feed a least once a day, so it does give both my readers who aren't following me something to read.
In good news, I won Best Army at the Origins Warhammer Fantasy Battles tournament put on by the Olde World Warriors. I finally picked up a new digital camera - so there are new pictures of them up on my site - http://puggimer.net/gratefulundead.html
Monday, May 18, 2009
Reconnecting - like a debitaliting kick in the crotch
It is something you don't anticipate, don't expect, and are surprised both by the event and by the fact that you can still react to it.
With all the new ways to connect, make new friends and find old ones - you simply never expect to go out, do a search for old friends, and come up with something else entirely.
Looking back at high school, it really wasn't a great time for me. In fact an awful lot of it sucked pretty big time. Even back to junior high school. And it all had to do with two bullies. They delighted in picking on me in many and various ways. One of them was definitely the worse of the two as well - someone that while I have never had to see again since he graduated a year ahead of me.
Then today, just browsing facebook for people from my high school that I'd like to re-connect with (and not finding any), I found him.
Just seeing he was on there caused a pit in my stomach. Probably even worse than if I were to find my ex-wife (who has been incommunicado for three years now), because at some level I expect that.
A weird part of me wanted to contact him, but I quickly beat that small spark into submission. I really don't want anything to do with him, and just knowing he is 'really' there is bad enough. It bothers me a lot that it bothers me though.
With all the new ways to connect, make new friends and find old ones - you simply never expect to go out, do a search for old friends, and come up with something else entirely.
Looking back at high school, it really wasn't a great time for me. In fact an awful lot of it sucked pretty big time. Even back to junior high school. And it all had to do with two bullies. They delighted in picking on me in many and various ways. One of them was definitely the worse of the two as well - someone that while I have never had to see again since he graduated a year ahead of me.
Then today, just browsing facebook for people from my high school that I'd like to re-connect with (and not finding any), I found him.
Just seeing he was on there caused a pit in my stomach. Probably even worse than if I were to find my ex-wife (who has been incommunicado for three years now), because at some level I expect that.
A weird part of me wanted to contact him, but I quickly beat that small spark into submission. I really don't want anything to do with him, and just knowing he is 'really' there is bad enough. It bothers me a lot that it bothers me though.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Learning to fly
Ah spring. The snow doesn't stick around nearly as long, the chives are taking over the back lawn, and the maple is bursting forth with seeds soon to be twirling all over the neighborhood, until they fin the perfect place to grow - the gutters.
Birds are nesting (and crapping all over my barbecue grill - WTF?!? ) and soon little peeps (and not the stale marshmallow ones growing hard on the counter) will be chirping with the sunrise. Not long after that, and it is time for then to get shoved from the nest out into the wiode world, to make their own way (and find new grills to crap on).
But at what time is it right to cut the strings, to push then out, to let the little ones fly free? How much can you do to prepare them to go out on their own? How many lessons can you give them, how much can you teach them before they simply have to face things on their own?
We don't abandon them. We try to help out as we can, gently guiding them to find their own way as they take their first steps towards independence. We point them in the right direction, but at some point we can no longer guide them. Eventually they leave the "nest" and must fly, or fall, on their own.
What so surprises me is that it isn't my children I'm talking about, as relevant as this may be for them. No, it is about co-workers at previous jobs. How long do you help and give them support (for free on top of it)? At what point do they need to simply go on their own? It has been five weeks (tomorrow will be one month at my new job, and six months since I was let go from where I had been for almost 20 years). And I'm still getting questions - and it still feels like they are lost.
I'm afraid I'm no better at letting (or forcing them to) fly free than I am with my kids.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Birds are nesting (and crapping all over my barbecue grill - WTF?!? ) and soon little peeps (and not the stale marshmallow ones growing hard on the counter) will be chirping with the sunrise. Not long after that, and it is time for then to get shoved from the nest out into the wiode world, to make their own way (and find new grills to crap on).
But at what time is it right to cut the strings, to push then out, to let the little ones fly free? How much can you do to prepare them to go out on their own? How many lessons can you give them, how much can you teach them before they simply have to face things on their own?
We don't abandon them. We try to help out as we can, gently guiding them to find their own way as they take their first steps towards independence. We point them in the right direction, but at some point we can no longer guide them. Eventually they leave the "nest" and must fly, or fall, on their own.
What so surprises me is that it isn't my children I'm talking about, as relevant as this may be for them. No, it is about co-workers at previous jobs. How long do you help and give them support (for free on top of it)? At what point do they need to simply go on their own? It has been five weeks (tomorrow will be one month at my new job, and six months since I was let go from where I had been for almost 20 years). And I'm still getting questions - and it still feels like they are lost.
I'm afraid I'm no better at letting (or forcing them to) fly free than I am with my kids.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
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