Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Why is it that everything today has to do with things either going in or coming out of my ass?

Yes, I have watched South Park.  And now that I'm 50 Cartman's quote from the first episode just seems to be feeling more appropriate.  Routine checkup last week, which meant a referral to a specialist.  Yes, I get the joy of having a camera stuck up where the sun doesn't shine just to take a look and see what is going on up there.

Of course a colonoscopy requires anesthesia, so it is a day off work (though I'm thinking that even on the worst day at my current job I'd rather be working).  But really, it is ok because I really REALLY wouldn't want to be awake for something like this anyway.  My doctor did say it is just a mile anesthesia, if I wanted to I could try to stay awake - but that just isn't on option I want to even consider.

It is actually two weeks away, but I can't stop thinking about it.  I have to avoid Olestra for a week before hand - but the whole warning about "anal seepage" has steered me clear of that forever.   Really, I may be fat but that doesn't mean I want to crap my pants to get thinner.  Then there comes the low fiber diet for a few days, with a liquid diet the day before.  Then comes the "preparation" - basically high powered laxatives (and it just seemed fitting to me that the SNL 40th special had the "Colon Blow" commercial on).  Really looking forward to getting up at 2 am to give my ass the dry heaves.

But what is really intriguing me how does a doctor end up choosing this as their specialty?  Brain surgeon - that is cool.  Obstetrician is another cool one - delivering babies.  I can even see some people that want to be podiatrists - we have all heard of people with a foot fetish, and it beats being a shoe salesman.  But proctologist?  Is this the guy who lost the lottery?  Or is he the last one in his class?  Did he get there late and nothing else was left?  Does anybody really go into medical school thinking "I want to specialize in looking up people's asses all day every day for the rest of my life!".  Now some of us end up in that virtual position. (makes me think of my previous job (I love the one I have now) because there were a lot of people there who actually seemed to spend every day with their heads up their asses).  Some jobs are about as much fun as being up someones butt.  But really choosing this?

Granted it is an effective screening and preventative for colon cancer, and I can see any doctor wanting to help prevent cancer in their patients.  But sticking a camera up peoples butts and then watching it on TV (and does your colon look ten pounds bigger on TV?) just doesn't seem to be the best career option.  Now honestly I haven't even met the doctor yet, and I assume that she (which is actually worse, having a man or woman look up your butt) is very smart and competent, and did great on all her exams in medical school.  And it is a "Digestive" specialty center - so she probably gets to look down peoples throats on occasion as well, which can make it better.

A few years ago, my wife had to go in for an Upper and Lower GI screening - which is putting cameras down your throat and up your butt.  I told her to make sure they did the Upper GI FIRST, and you don't want to piss off that doctor!  Make them mad and when you wake up they'll ask how it tasted smartass!  (Oh, and you know what the difference is between and Oral and Anal thermometer?  The taste!).

So I'm not really worried, but I just had to get some of these jokes out.   And I figure I don't ALWAYS have to bitch here.  (I actually started a happy blog about my gaming hobby (not gambling, or video games - but actual physical games you have to have another person to play with, most involve miniatures.  Because it's all fun and games Until Somebody Loses An Eye.

Tuesday, February 03, 2015

Getting Cranky in my old age

Maybe this is a better forum for me to rant a bit.  Not that anyone will read it (because who reads a blog that is updated only once a year?).  But at least here when I actually research an opinion it can't be deleted for being too controversial where I had posted it.

I find that I don't tend to write (at all) when I'm in a good mood - happiness is just not much of a muse for me.  When I'm not however, then I get in the mood to rant and rave and become a Tubthumper, and it seems like there is a lot of things that are just pissing me off right now.

I don't want to repeat my facebook post, nor try to recreate the deleted responses here.  But they did make me think (which as my wife will attest to is a VERY dangerous thing).

Whatever happened to the right in our society to be wrong?  I don't mean the right to believe in something that is incorrect.  Unfortunately that is being upheld constantly these days - and even worse being validated by sheer force of will, all evidence and scientific rigor be damned.  No, I mean that we have some how lost the ability to actually be told and accept that we are wrong.

There is no greater learning experience than making a mistake and correcting it.  It is said that wisdom is the ability to make good decisions, and you gain wisdom by making bad decisions.  However you can't correct and learn from (thus gaining wisdom) a bad decision if everyone around you is so busy trying to pump up your self esteem (which cannot be given, but must be earned) that you don't ever see that it is wrong.

The idea that every opinion is valid is in itself an invalid premise, but is being promoted more and more.  Along with this is the notion that we have to respect other peoples beliefs, even if we disagree with them.  I call BULLSHIT on this.  You need to respect people yes.  But you do not need to respect their beliefs, especially when they are flat out wrong.

Children will NEVER learn if they are never corrected when they make a mistake.  If you don't tell little Johnny that when he wrote that 2 + 2 = 3 he was wrong, and the correct answer is 4, he will never learn basic math and eventually grow up to be a budget analyst for the federal government, completely unable to see the basic fact that you cannot balance a budget if you spend more money than you take in.  If you never correct the teenage Jane when she doesn't know the difference between correlation and causation so that she believes because everyone wears coats in the winter (correlation) that by wearing coats, the temperature goes down (causation), she may grow up to be an actress who spouts off absolute uniformed crap from a discredited and debunked fraud on a national stage and pushes a movement that ends up with hundreds of children in the hospital with completely preventable illnesses, and some of these unfortunate kids end up dead.

Not all ideas or beliefs are valid.  The universe DOES NOT revolve around the earth, no matter how much you might believe it does because you think you are the center of all creation.  The earth is not flat, nor is it hollow.  There is no bearded omniscient, omnipotent being living in the sky created everything in six days, and then created it again in a DIFFERENT ORDER in the next chapter of your book, and both of these creations have the earth as the center of existence.  Sorry, but there are no pixies, dragons, elves or vampires (and I for one really wish there were dragons - just so they could eat some of these idiots out there).  People do NOT bend spoons with their minds, magicians do NOT saw their assistants in half, and psychics cannot see the future.

We need to go back to a mindset where you can tell someone they are wrong.  We need to stop this insanity of accepting every inane utterance that comes out of peoples mouths as fact.  Even more so, we need to quickly abandon the idea that there are equal sides to every story, and just because SCIENCE states something doesn't mean that alternates aren't valid.  Guess what - THEY AREN'T VALID.  Neil DeGrasse Tyson made a wonderful quote on Real Time with Bill Maher: "The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it".

It is ok to be wrong, provided that you do not refuse to acknowledge when presented with the facts that show you are wrong.  What is not ok is to fight against the facts, insisting that your opinion is correct against all the evidence that shows it is not, and refusing to correct yourself.  Then even worse, spreading your incorrect beliefs and be offended when rational people point out that you are wrong.  Accept that perhaps you are not the omniscient being you think you might be on a given subject - take a look at what the REAL experts in a field have to say about it, and change your mind.  And in doing so, gain at least a tiny bit of wisdom, which this world is in serious need of right now.